Update on Paul's Surgery

Abundant thanks to all who have prayed us through this day.  The Lord heaped grace upon grace as the day unfolded, and I find myself overwhelmed at God's goodness to us tonight.  I just got home a few minutes ago, so I thought I would post a quick update.

Paul's surgery took a little more than three hours, but the surgeon seemed pleased with how it went.  A section of Paul's colon was very bad, but it was a smaller section than they originally anticipated.  The surgeon was also happy with the way he was able to join the remaining sections, so Paul does not have a temporary colostomy or any other complication of that nature.  That is a tremendous answer to prayer.  He has received excellent care all day, and when I left a few minutes ago, they were doing what they could to manage his pain level.

He will probably be in the hospital for about a week. (He bleeds maize and blue, so he's pretty bummed that he won't be home with our boys to watch Michigan play in the Sugar Bowl.)  I am blessed that his mom is here to care for our children, so I am free to minister to him and help him.  I'm sure the next few days will be rough, so we appreciate the continued prayers.

As I drove home tonight, I was thinking about all the tiny ways God showed his care for us today-- a lady at the hospital coffee bar early this morning who gave me coffee 35 minutes before she was supposed to open, the volunteer in the surgery waiting room who smiled and updated me regularly, our pastor who came so early to be with us and pray with us, a dear friend who came to sit with me and brought a little needlepoint to give me an outlet for my nervous energy, all of the e-mails and texts, and some other friends who came to the hospital or came to watch the kids so Paul's mom could spend a bit of time with him too.  It has been truly overwhelming, and I praise the Lord tonight.

As the surgeon finished giving me the update after the surgery, I thanked him and said, "I just want you to know that there are people all over the world that have been praying for you today."

He looked startled, and then said, "Thank you.  I probably needed it."

Don't we all.

My heart is absolutely overwhelmed by the love and care shown to us today by Christ and His children.  Thank you all for praying.

I will continue to post updates as Paul recovers.

Back to the Hospital Again

God's plan for today was different than ours...

Paul got really sick again this morning.  After several calls to the nurse at the surgeon's office, I drove Paul to the hospital.  It was the sickest I've seen him yet.

After fluids, pain medication, and nausea medication, they decided to keep him overnight to complete the surgery prep.  His surgery is still scheduled for 7:30 am tomorrow.

We are doing our best to rest in the sovereignty of God, but I think we are both exhausted.  The prayers of our friends and family are a great gift to us.

Please pray for a smooth surgery, no complications following the surgery, and a complete recovery for Paul.  Pray also for the children and for God's grace to be poured out on  our whole family.

We are now off to the airport to pick up Paul's mom.

May the Lord make His name very great both today and in the days ahead.

Three Answers to Prayer

I woke up extremely anxious yesterday morning and went racing (and I mean racing) to God with my worries.  By the end of the day, He had spoken four times to me-- once by directing my flustered heart to Matthew 6, and three times with specific answers to specific prayers.

1.  He sent an unexpected financial gift to help pay some bills, and He gave us the gift of the humbling and awe that comes from being helped and loved so much.

2. We only have one vehicle, and Paul's mom is coming Thursday night to stay with the kids while Paul is in the hospital.  Some friends called and offered us the use of their truck while they are out of town, so now I can leave my van for Paul's mom to use, and she won't be stranded at home while I'm at the hospital with Paul.  (New prayer request: Parking the big truck!)

3.  I did not yet have anyone coming to sit with me during the surgery.  My dear friend and mentor, Jane, called last night and offered to come to the hospital to be with me while I sit and wait.

Bless the Lord, O my soul...

Another Trip to the Hospital

It's already been an eventful week, but not in the "Christmas-tacular" way we had planned.  Paul woke up Monday morning with another intestinal attack that culminated in uncontrollable nausea and vomiting by late afternoon.  I called our doctor at about 4:30pm to see what I should do.  He called the surgeon, and we were told to go immediately to the ER.  They did a lot of blood work, put him on an IV, kept him overnight, and then released him to come home yesterday.  They don't know why he got so sick, but the doctors decided not to move his surgery up.  He's still scheduled to have his surgery on December 30.

I have to admit that despite the stress, there is a grace in all of this.  He has been feeling so much better in the last few weeks that both of us had small lingering doubts about whether he should even have the surgery.  The Lord used this most recent attack to show us both that the surgery is indeed necessary.  I am firmly convinced that this is the route the Lord would have us take to try to find an end to the problems that Paul has suffered with for so many months now.

So now we are moving on toward Christmas, trying to keep our focus on Christ and the celebration of His birth, and praying hard that Paul won't have any more trouble before the 30th.  The prayers of our family and friends are a great gift, and we are so appreciative of the love and encouragement that has been poured out on our family.

This morning I find myself even more thankful for Emmanuel-- God with us.  It is a great comfort that we do not travel this road alone.

Update on Paul's health

Paul has been dealing with some relatively severe intestinal issues since coming home from Iraq in 2009, and it was determined this week that he will need to have a portion of his colon removed. We are anticipating his surgery to be on December 30, and the surgeon told us to expect a week-long hospital stay plus several weeks of recovery. This is major, but we are hopeful that he will have a full recovery with no further symptoms after that.

Due to the large number of out-of state family and friends that we are updating about this latest development, I am going to use the blog to post updates when the surgery happens. We are grateful for the prayers of our family and friends. Please pray for the children as well. They have expressed some fear regarding the surgery.

For now, we are thankful to be looking forward to Christmas together. Our prayer is that the Lord would be magnified as we walk this next path that He has chosen for us. We know that all that comes into our lives is filtered through the sovereign, loving hands of God.

Math "Little Boy Style"

Today's math lesson with my six-year old went something like this:

Math Book: "Tell a subtraction story from this picture." (The picture had 3 pineapples and 6 papayas.)

Isaac: "Once there were 9 fruits. The papayas wanted to wrestle with the pineapples, but then they got scared because the pineapples could knock them over, so they ran away. 9-6=3!"

Math "little-boy-style" is too funny! Where does he get these things?

Potato Chip Packaging and God's Sense of Humor

I had no idea I had such strong opinions on potato chip packaging.

Yep, potato chip packaging.

When I was invited to take part in some paid marketing research about some potato chips, my only concern was the "paid" part.  I've been praying for God to provide for us financially, and it paid $100!  I couldn't believe that someone would pay me $100 to give my opinion on potato chips.  I still laugh when I think about it.  I could never even dream this stuff up.  God providing through my opinions on potato chips.

So I went a couple of weeks ago, gave my opinions for an hour to the guy on the other side of the table, and surprisingly, had some strong opinions about the packaging he showed me.  I never even tasted a chip that day, although it was a brand I've eaten before.  That makes the story even funnier to me.  It was all about the outside of the bags.

I left with my check, thanking God for providing in such an amazing way, and I thought that was the end of it.

Then a lady called yesterday from the same place.  Apparently, unbeknownst to me, they videotaped the potato-chip-packaging-opinion-giving interviews.  To make the whole story even more comical, the lady said that the tape ran out before my interview was done.  They wanted me to come back and see if I could redo the last 10 minutes of the interview, and they would pay me the $100 again.

So today I'm going to give my last few opinions all over again...

and make another $100...

about potato chip packaging.

Who knew I had such valuable opinions?  I sure didn't.

Only the Lord can dream up such ways of providing for our family.  I just have to laugh.

In the Fire

We are in the fire right now.  There's no ignoring it, no denying it, and very little we can do about it but pray and trust and cling to Christ and each other.  I don't know what our future holds, and quite frankly, the unknowns spark a range of emotions from being slightly unsettled to downright terrified.  I have struggled to comprehend some of the difficulties we have experienced since Paul came home from Iraq-- mostly difficulties relating to his health issues and our own financial situation.

I know we aren't alone, even though the heart is often slow to follow the head.  Christ said He would never leave us nor forsake us.  God said in Isaiah not to be afraid because He had called us by His name and we are His.  He promised that when we passed through the waters, He would be with us, when we passed through the floods they wouldn't sweep over us, and when we walked through the fire we wouldn't be burned, because we are precious in His sight.  He said He knows our frame and remembers that we are dust.  He said He would fulfill His purpose in us and be faithful to complete the good work He had begun.

So I cling to these promises like a child trying desperately to hang on to the monkey bars so she doesn't fall to the hard ground below.  The Spirit supports me and brings encouragement, just as a parent holds the child onto the bars so they can make it safely across without falling.

There aren't too many people that follow this little blog, and I keep it mostly as a place to write down things that the Lord is teaching me as we step heavenward day by day.  If the Lord happens to bring you to this post on this tiny blog, we would be grateful for your prayers for our family.

I do not know what God is doing, but I know He is doing something.

On that knowledge, I plod on...

All Grace Abounds

II Corinthians 9:8- "And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work."

The following poem was written several months ago, and it is even more true today.  Amy Carmichael said of II Cor. 9:8, "All means all, not some;  always means always, not sometimes.  Lord, today help us to live upon this all."

II Cor. 9:8
On hard days, Lord,
On good days, Lord,
You say, "All grace abounds."

In the light of dawn,
At deep twilight,
You say, "All grace abounds."

When in my life
Naught else abounds,
And I behold
Scant provisions,
        scarce solutions,
             the overwhelming impossible,
Even then,
You say, "All grace abounds."

Why, dear Lord?
Why does all grace abound?
Why do You make it so?
"So that,"
Two tiny words-
A purpose?
In Your sufficiency,
At all times,
In all things,
Good works abound.
Because--
You said, "All grace abounds."

Super Mom vs. Abiding Mom

Our school year officially begins tomorrow, and I guess I have to admit that I have mixed feelings.  I'm ready for the routine,  but I also find myself wishing that summer was here for a bit longer.

We had a hard summer in many ways.  The Lord especially taught me much about His expectations of me as a wife and mother versus my expectations.  By God's providence, I came across a chart called "Super Mom vs. Abiding Mom" that has been very thought-provoking for me on this journey. It came from a homeschooling blog, but it's not just for homeschoolers.  It is instructive for all moms.  I share it here in the hopes that it might encourage someone else.

So for now I plod onward toward another school year, trusting the Lord to continue to teach me what it means to abide.

Morning Glories and Grace

Sarah and I planted Morning Glory seeds this summer near a trellis we made with bamboo poles and twine.  I had no idea how much I would fall in love with these beautiful flowers.  The seed packet must have had a mix of colors, because we are now finding flowers of about six different shades of pink, white, and purple. They are just gorgeous!

And isn't it just like the Lord to teach me more truths about Himself through my garden?

I watch these beautiful flowers bloom every morning, and they only bloom for that day.  By the end of the day, they are faded and wrinkled.  They shine gloriously, and then fade as evening comes.

But then the next morning, more blooms have appeared, and I get to enjoy them all over again.  I have come to love opening the curtains every morning just to see the lovely, bright flowers with their faces turned toward the sun.

At night you can see the next day's flowers tightly wrapped in the calyx, just waiting to burst forth into bloom, but then they are new flowers the next morning, repeating the cycle once again.

As I looked at them this morning, the Lord brought my mind to the mercy that is new every morning.  His mercy is given for that moment-- for that day-- and I move through the hours that are filled with activity, responsibility, and sometimes great trial.  By the end of my day, I am faded and shriveled and used up, and I crawl into bed praying for much-needed rest and new mercies for the next day.

And those mercies are always there-- those mercies that come fresh and new and bursting with life-giving beauty.

This morning that mercy came in the form of a realization that God's glory is stamped on even the smallest things.  Those flowers are reminders that grace flows down.  They are reminders that even tiny things like Morning Glories, with their short, insignificant little lives, glorify God perfectly by pointing to the Creator who fills me up and gives me the strength to bloom where I'm planted, with my face turned toward the Son.

I think that for the rest of my life, I'll always wonder if this is why they are called "Morning Glories".

Be Still

Ps. 46:10- "Be still, and know that I am God.  I will be exalted among the nations.  I will be exalted in the earth.


Psalm 46:10

"Be still," God says.
"But, Lord," I say,
"I have so much to do."

"Be still," He says.
"Abide," He says,
"There's much I want to do in you."

Mental Aerobics

We have just two more days of school left for the year!  We are all anxious to spend some time doing the fun things that come our way this summer, and I'm anxious to get caught up on my house projects.

I've been doing a lot of thinking and evaluating over the last few days.  What worked this year?  What didn't work?  How can I streamline my tasks?  How can I be more organized?  What should I plan for next year?

One thing is certain.  With four students in three grades, I spend the day jumping mentally from...

...short and long vowels
...to division of decimals
...to botany
...to synonyms
...to Psalms and the attributes of God
...to prepositional phrases and dependent clauses
...to printing letters and numbers
...to the causes of the Revolutionary War
...to syllables
...to Bob Books
...to 3-digit addition
...to the Westminster Shorter Catechism
...and on and on and on!

The mental aerobics are exhausting and challenging to my feeble brain!  Now if I could just burn as many calories with the mental aerobics as I would with regular aerobics.  Wouldn't that be grand!

The World is in Bloom

I absolutely love the moment when the stark, drab gray of winter is gone and spring makes its long-awaited arrival in my yard.  Right now I have red tulips, yellow daffodils, pink and white bleeding hearts, and grape hyacinths blooming!  Our pear tree and cherry tree are filled with beautiful white blooms, and an ornamental crabapple is right on the cusp of bursting out into a bright pink, breathtaking display.  I could stand and look at these flowers all day long.  What a lovely reminder of the paintbrush of God.

I wonder if He looks at the flowers blooming and laughs with great joy in the colors that He made?  I am made in His image, and I find such pleasure in the hues and blooms, so I think He must.  I can only imagine His happiness as He holds His glorious paintbrush and says to a tulip, "Here, little one.  I'm going to paint you with orange and yellow, and the one who sees you will marvel at My design!"

Oh, how I love the spring!

I've come to realize...

...several things in the last week.

1.  Paper plates are worth the money.  I would rather play a game of "Sorry" with my eight-year old on a Sunday afternoon instead of washing dishes.
2.  It is bittersweet when your baby turns six.
3.  It is even more bittersweet when that six year old loses his first tooth.
4.  The thing I like most about my home is being there with the five people I love most in this world.
5.  I need to focus more time and energy on the things that are unseen and eternal in my home instead of the visible and temporal.  Laundry waits, hearts don't.

Lord, let me see what is important, and help me not to stress about the unimportant.

For Easter

I think in paragraphs and stories. I long to spend hours writing, and then I somehow feel like the things I would write are too tender or too insignificant to share. The days go by, and the stories remain unwritten-- for now, at least.

My calendar has been full, our days have been busy, and the stress of life seems like almost too much sometimes. Even to say that, though, I know that so many have far more stress than I do. I have the responsibility of leading our homeschool co-op, and even that has been a really rough road lately. On this night before Easter, I'm just plain tired. Exhausted, really.

I don't say all of this to complain, but more to explain why I feel like Easter has come upon me suddenly this year-- without much stillness or time for contemplation. Here it is, the middle of the night before Easter, and I can't sleep, despite my exhaustion.

Were the disciples unable to sleep on the night before the Resurrection? What about Mary? On that dark night before the glorious dawn, what were they thinking? Was the stress of life almost too much for them? Had the events of life left them little time for contemplation? Were they even able to share the things they were thinking at that moment, or did they feel that those thoughts were either too tender or too insignificant? Were they full of fear and despair-- trying to face the reality that the One in whom they had placed their hopes and dreams had been nailed to a cross a few days earlier.

Ah, but then the next day everything changed. Christ was risen! The amazing truth that gives my current small difficulties some perspective is that my Jesus lives. I'm not alone, and He is not dead. I have a High Priest that is able to sympathize with my weaknesses. He understands that I get stressed, discouraged, hurt, and laden down with life. And He lives. He lives. He lives.

When life feels like I'm just slowly trudging uphill, He lives.

When I am heavy- hearted, He lives.

When I'm filled with joy or sadness or confusion or weariness, He lives.

He lives, and He gives me life.

He lives.

He lives.

And on that one truth I place all of my hope, because if Christ is not risen, then my faith is in vain.  He lives. He lives on this night before Easter.

And my exhausted heart finds rest yet again.

A Fun Poem on a Cold Day

We are snowed in right now, so I have been working in my house.  I have been noticing all of the dust, and that set me to thinking about one of my favorite poems.  Maybe it can bring some smiles on a cold, cold day!

Dust
Author Unknown

Dust if you must, but wouldn't it better
To paint a picture or write a letter,
Bake a cake or plant a seed,
Ponder the difference between want and need?

Dust if you must, but there's not much time,
With rivers to swim and mountains to climb,
Music to hear and books to read,
Friends to cherish and life to lead.

Dust if you must, but the world's out there,
With the sun in your eyes, the wind in your hair,
A flutter of snow, a shower of rain,
This day will not come around again.

Dust if you must, but bear in mind,
Old age will come, and it is not kind.
And when you go-- and go you must,
You, my friend, will make more dust!