Rudderless

Paul called home one day last week to check in with me, and he asked how my day was going.  I said, "I feel rudderless today.  Absolutely rudderless."  Then it dawned on me why I felt that way.  I had stayed in bed later than usual and then one of my kids got up earlier than usual.  I wasn't able to have the quiet time with God that has become like my very morning food over the last two years.  No wonder I felt rudderless.  The unfinished, most-important thing in my day was hanging over my head.  I hadn't acknowledged the One that directs my steps, so I was completely lost.  What a realization.

When Paul deployed, I very quickly learned that if I was going to have any joy at all through those twelve long months, I was going to have to start each day giving everything over to God.  It became my habit and something that I actually look forward to each morning.  What I didn't realize, though, is how much I had come to depend on that time.  It is my "breakfast" of solitude, reflection, prayer, and listening to what God wants for my day (although it is always done with a cup of coffee in my hand!)

Sometimes the baby-steps of progress in my Christian life are so imperceptible that I hardly see them.  What a grace that God would allow me to see how He has brought me along in my own personal walk.

I started the day rudderless.  I ended the day encouraged and thankful.  Onward I plod-- by God's grace and for His glory.